![\"sucking\"](\"http:\/\/www.yobeat.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2009\/09\/sucking.jpg\" "\\"sucking\\"")
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Snowboarding is not an overly difficult activity, but some people just possess a natural ability to do it better than others. If you are one of those \u201cothers,\u201d you\u2019re screwed. As a wise man once said, \u201cSnowboarding is not about having fun. It\u2019s about being good.\u201d Let\u2019s face it, that\u2019s true, and people who tell you otherwise clearly suck. When you are good at snowboarding, not only do you look super cool, but you get more ass, tons of free gear, and needn\u2019t have pesky responsibilities because you are getting so rich thanks to your talent. But since we can\u2019t all do double corks and win the extreme games, there has to be another way. Allow me to present a few simple solutions for those who possess a less than stellar ability to shred.<\/p>\n
1. Study up.<\/strong> There is an enormous amount of information to be gleaned from the Internet and annual product catalogs. Armed with this knowledge you can spam the Internet with informed hate comments and look like a super pro on message boards. People will assume you are amazing because you know so much. For bonus cred, start a blog and write stupid stories like this one!<\/p>\n 2. Get the \u201cbest\u201d gear, but then make it look shitty<\/strong>. (Run it over with your car, ride it into rocks, etc.) You should then spend most of your time on the deck of your local hill\u2019s lodge, talking about how you can\u2019t ride because your expensive Burton board is so thrashed due to you shredding it so hard.<\/p>\n 3. Try really, really hard tricks. <\/strong>No one expects you to land that corked 10 every time, but if you are even trying it, you must be awesome. When you only get the 180 around, well, the take off was rutted and your edges are set up for rails, duh.<\/p>\n 4. Get Hurt.<\/strong> The beauty of being hurt is you can\u2019t go snowboarding. If you are not on hill for a legitimate reason such as a torn ACL or broken wrist, no one can argue when you say you are good. Just make sure you got that injury doing something badass, because if it was slipping out on a heelside turn, your jig is up.<\/p>\n 5. Be friends with Nick Lipton. <\/strong>If he thinks you are cool, he\u2019ll give you a Hump Day interview and then everyone will know you are awesome.<\/p>\n Now, for all of you who\u2019s sarcasm* detectors are broken, commence the hate comments!<\/p>\n *Sarcasm: a new literary device where people say something they don\u2019t really mean. <\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Archives Snowboarding is not an overly difficult activity, but some people just possess a natural ability to do it better than others. If you are one of those \u201cothers,\u201d you\u2019re screwed. As a wise man once said, \u201cSnowboarding is not about having fun. It\u2019s about being good.\u201d Let\u2019s face it, that\u2019s true, and people who tell you otherwise clearly suck. When you are good at snowboarding, not only do you look super cool, but you get more ass, tons of free gear, and needn\u2019t have pesky responsibilities because you are getting so rich thanks to your talent. But since we […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":6,"featured_media":7043,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0},"categories":[2251,2194],"tags":[1424,1425,1426],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/brookegeery.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7042"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/brookegeery.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/brookegeery.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brookegeery.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/6"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brookegeery.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=7042"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/brookegeery.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7042\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":91788,"href":"https:\/\/brookegeery.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7042\/revisions\/91788"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brookegeery.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/7043"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/brookegeery.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=7042"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brookegeery.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=7042"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/brookegeery.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=7042"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}