NINE REASONS RIDING POWDER SUCKS

Cole Karow, somewhere at Lost Trail Powder Mountain in Montana.

First of all, sike! Riding powder does not suck at all. It’s pretty much the best way you could spend a day snowboarding or otherwise. But since we’re stuck on the snowless East Coast while our friends are gloating over getting shacked as fuck on social media, we need some reminders of why it’s not totally the end of the world to miss out. If you’re in a similar boat, read on for our list of the minor inconveniences and annoyances that come along with riding powder.

1. You could die. This is a very real factor in the powder game. Whether an avalanche or a tree well- low visibility, high stoke and variable conditions can have dire consequences. Be careful out there, friends.
2. Shoveling sucks. If the trails are buried that means your car is probably buried too. Even worse, you may have to dig yourself a path just to get to it. Fuck that noise.
3. It’s Exhausting. No matter what sweet pow board you’ve got or how good of shape you’re in, riding pow requires effort and strength. And how will you get anything else done in a day when you have exerted every last bit of energy lapping pillow lines!?
4. You have to get up early. If you want best stuff, you gotta get there when the lifts start to spin. We firmly believe getting up early should be reserved for farmers and school children, and is not part of any activity considered “fun.”
5. You may have to hike. Inevitably “the goods” are not lift accessed. And your friends will probably be like “oh come on, it’s not that far and it’ll be sick” and pretty soon you’ll be trudging through waist deep snow in search of some line you don’t even really care about riding. And then you’ll have even less energy to boot!
6. Aggro pow hounds. You know the guy. He has his schedule set so he can drop everything at the rumor of 6 inches or more. His Gortex is still shiny and he’s liable to poke your eye out with his pow shape because he’s frothing so heard he just can’t control himself in the lift line. Yeah, fuck that guy.
7. Your friends will ditch you. Well, only if you suck, so disregard this one if you’re remotely fun to ride with.
8. You get wet/cold. All your shit is now soaking wet and if you lazily leave it in a pile in the trunk of your car you will not only have mold/odor issues, but your next day trying to ride is a total bust. You’re way too lazy for that nonsense.
9. It makes your face hurt. Even if you don’t have a beard to get frozen into an ice mass, your cheeks ache seriously at the end of the day. Pain from pleasure? Uhg, fuck that.

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