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With the snowboard industry in constant turmoil, there’s a good chance that at some point you’re going to lose that cushy industry job you lucked into. Not sure if you’ve talked to “the kids” lately, but they’re all gunning for you and will gladly work for well below the poverty line (instead of at the poverty line like you, you greedy, greedy bastard.) Anyway, whether you’ve been laid off, let go, or just plain shitcanned, your friends at Yobeat (who’ve invented their own industry jobs) are here to help, as usual.

The Bad News:

You have no money saved and since you probably were hired as a “contractor” the government won’t do shit for you. Except for Food Stamps, you can probably get those if you try hard enough. So this means you’ll need to find another job immediately, and as it turns out, the skills you’ve learned in the snowboard world are completely useless in the real world. No one at “insert name of big time marketing firm here” cares about the community of 5000 dedicated fans you managed. Sorry.

The Good News:

You’ve already made it into the snowboard industry, which means, you’re now qualified for ANY other job open in the snowboard industry. Oh, you packed boxes? Well apply for that open Marketing Manager job. That hands-on product experience you have is probably exactly what they’re looking for. Oh, you were a Team manager? Why not try outside sales? Shops are much easier to wrangle than team riders. You get the idea.

The important thing in this time of personal growth is to stay positive! Think of it as an opportunity rather than a set back and remember the best news of all. Worst case scenario, you can always go back to being a ski bum!

Plenty has been written about how to get your foot in the door in snowboarding, but everyone knows the true path to industry success is starting a blog, so no need to write another story about that. No, this story is for those people who’ve already “made it.” The ones who put in their years as a rider, then moved on to an industry desk job, and now find themselves at a turning point and are looking to take that next step into the “real world.” It’s a big decision to give up things like powder days off, cheap/free gear and a meager paycheck, but at some point, many industry types will find themselves ready to make the leap. For you, we offer these future career plans.

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Become a bouncer/bartender

If you’re ready to give up the snowboard industry, but not the occasional snowboarding itself, this is a great option for you. You’ll work mostly nights and weekends, leaving you all week to go snowboard. These jobs also will not require you to shave, or get a haircut, and the more menacing you look, the better. Basically, it’s like your years of snowboarding have specifically trained you for a nighttime service job.

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Go work in a different extreme industry

Chances are in all your years of snowboard industrying, you haven’t really learned anything that valuable. At least, not in a way you can transfer your skills to a big money, high profile job in a totally unrelated industry. But there is one loophole that will enable you to advance elsewhere despite your complete lack of qualification: a different, but similar job in another “action sport.” Perhaps Mountain Biking is your passion, or skateboarding, or surfing. All of these jobs are basically like snowboarding, but warmer. The easiest way to achieve this goal is to target an employer such as an energy drink or footwear giant that also deals in snowboarding, but doesn’t really know the difference between it and the sport you want to work in. They’ll accept your snowboarding experience as valid, and all your dreams will come true!

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Go back to school

Nothing will help you make the life change you’re looking for like going back to school. Sure, when you get out of school you’ll find yourself in debt and hardly more qualified than when you started, but those few years will be deemed as “productive” and “socially acceptable” and maybe by then you’ll have figured out what you really want to do.

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Get on a reality TV Show

Once upon a time if you wanted to be successful in a new field you would go back to school, and then work your way up the ranks slowly. Not anymore! Now if you want to be a chef, designer, artist or any other skilled craftsman, there’s a TV show to get you there. Or maybe you just want to find love, preferably with a million dollar bonus at the end. There’s a show for that too! And even if you don’t win the grand prize, after you’ve starred in one reality show, your acting career is right around the corner.

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Start a restaurant or Coffee shop

Now that you’ve conquered the snowboard industry, there is no reason you can’t dive into your own business. And what business is more likely to succeed than a new restaurant! Ok, that is a lie, but it hasn’t stopped many former snowboarders from embarking on such a journey. And hey, if your restaurant starts failing, there’s a reality show for that, too!

Move to Brooklyn

It won’t really work though. The snowboard industry is sort of like the mafia — once you’re in, you’re in for life.