Portland Oregon-Based Digital Media

Snowboarder or Gypsy?

Posted by Brooke Geery in Features | Random






Being a pro snowboarder has always meant living a nomadic lifestyle, not unlike that of a Gypsy. Traveling around the globe to follow the snow, and occasionally causing mischief, well, I’m surprised someone hasn’t brought it up before. And now with the fashion trends that seem to be sweeping the snowboard world, it’s getting almost as hard to tell snowboarders from gypsies as it is to tell hipsters from the homeless.

We figured it was probably time to give you some tips on how to tell if the individual you are dealing is simply a “brohemian” who will just steal your weed, or a gypsy who will take you for everything you are worth. Here are five simple steps to be sure.

1) Check their scarf. A real gypsy either wove it themselves from the hair of small children or found in a gutter. If you are dealing with a snowboarder, there is probably an extreme logo on there somewhere.
2) Luggage is always key. A snowboarder probably has nice, matching bags from their sponsor. A gypsy usually travels with garbage bags or cardboard boxes. Be sure to check the contents, because what you think could be a gypsy, might actually be a snowboarder who just received a box of new gear or a really cool snowboarder without a luggage sponsor.
3) Ask them to predict the future. A real gypsy will likely try to get you to pay them. A snowboarder will simply tell you about how sweet the party will be tonight.
4) Go to their house. If it’s a snowboarder you’ll soon be at a sweet condo somewhere in the mountains. A gypsy lives in a clan, in caravans.
5) Look at their bank account. A gypsy probably won’t have one. The snowboarder on the other hand, probably receives regular deposits from mom and dad.

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