Writing – Photos – Travel – Crafts

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If you hate reading, just go click here or the image above and vote!

I’ve never actually participated in an Internet popularity contest. I’ve run plenty of them and promoted plenty of them, but this is a first. Me and my writing are up for an award and geez whiz, I really wanna win! Now I am fully aware that this sort of thing is considered SPAM and I’ve already been told, “I don’t do Facebook contest stuff” once.

I get it. I watch the local news too about how your social presence can RUIN YOUR LIFE FOREVER. But here’s the truth. If you’re sitting in front of a computer all day anyway, you can unsubscribe from the thing it adds to your page as quickly as you subscribe. You actually control your own Facebook, not the other way around.

However, me ranting will not convince you to vote. Instead, here are several convincing reasons why you should take 2 minutes out of your day to help me out.

1. You just wasted a bunch of time reading this post. What’s a few more minutes?

2. I worked hard on my story and you like it.

3. I’ve done something for you in the past. This can range from an internet vote, to posting your video and getting you tons of hits, to getting you a job, to introducing you to the right person, to cooking you delicious dinner, to getting you drunk. I don’t know, I try to help people out when I can.

4. You don’t want to be on my bad side. Trust me, ask anyone who is.

5. Because we’re friends. And being friends is the greatest reward of all.

I should probably stop before this post gets too long for the Internet and you get distracted before actually voting.

VOTE HERE

Please note: you must log in with Facebook and then click vote. If you don’t want spam on your wall, you can click on your profile and delete it. Thank you.

Sarah Morrison came to visit a few months ago, and we were reminiscing fondly over time when we used to make content for fun, not just for others’ enjoyment. From that came the idea for Thursdays at the Office, the hottest new series on Yobeat. The above episode was the first that we filmed, playing off an actual episode of The Office plot line, and making Sarah and I laugh hysterically. Unfortunately, the target audience of Yobeat not only doesn’t pay close enough attention to TV to get the Office reference, but doesn’t care about Sarah, or me, or anyone else in the episode. So it’s being relegated to here and I know all 7 of you will enjoy it!

REAL episodes of Thursdays at the Office drop every other Thursday or so on Yobeat.

I’ve really been embracing this social media business lately. I know that’s my job and I’ve been running a website since the dawn of websites, but admittedly, I’ve only recently embraced the full potential of Facebook. I’m still not convinced it has any sort of staying power in the ever-changing social media landscape, but I have finally been seeing the usefulness — Not just driving traffic, but also finding joy in posting something that gets “good engagement.”

So how does one get good engagement on Facebook, you may ask? Between Yobeat, and some freelance work I’ve been doing, I’ve finally got it figured out. It’s not asking questions. It’s not posting products, links or stories, or even doing giveaways. No, just like everything else on the internet, the answer to facebook engagement is porn.

Unfortunately, even though this video was clearly tasteful and relevant to snowboarding, I awoke this morning to find Facebook had removed my most successful post ever, and all the amazing and hilarious comments that follow. At least I took a screen grab.

It’s been awhile since I’ve done one of these posts putting people on blast, since I’m pretty busy these days running a website that is apparently quite successful. But along with the success of Yobeat has come an influx of incredible offers, opportunities and suggestions of ways for random start-ups and other bad ideas to involve themselves in the site. Without further adieu, I present some of my favorites from the last week.

Subject:     Free Professional Writer for Yobeat

Hope keeping well. I’m just getting in touch to ask if you’re open to reviewing content from freelance writers at Yobeat – if so, I’d love to put together a high-quality article written specifically for the site. I’m 29 and have been working as a professional writer and researcher for five years now, and in that time there isn’t a lot I haven’t already covered (I’ve attached a few samples below for you to check out).

As long as you’re happy with the resulting material, you’d be welcome to publish it as you see fit and the content will be owned by you entirely (in that I won’t send it to anyone else, either before or after publication).

There is absolutely no charge for this and no strings attached; the only thing I would ask in return is that I’m able to include a link to a site of my choosing within the article – nothing shady or unethical, just one of the professional businesses I freelance for.

Do let me know if you’re interested, and if so I can get something written for you over the course of the next few days. Needless to say, the offer is open to any other sites you might own as well as yobeat.com. I appreciate you may not be interested in this kind of mutual back-scratching however, so if I don’t hear from you, no offence taken and I won’t trouble you again.

 

Sorry honey, you lost me when you put the words “free” and “professional” next to each other. Glad you’re not taking offense, which is how we spell the word here in ‘Merica.

Hi,
I’d like to inquire about doing a sponsored blog post on your site http://www.yobeat.com for our site XXXXXX. We sell Liquidation of furniture such as cubicles/modular workstations, desks, chairs and more and have been in business since 2001. Our budget is around $15 for the post. and we can also write the post if you’d like Is this something you’d be open to?
It would probably be a short interesting blurb 250-350 words about furniture/design and our company.
Regards,
XXXX

Hi, this is obvious a mass email, but I’m not sure the readers of a snowboard site will be interested in your furniture. While yes, they likely use furniture, I’m just not sure this would be a “good fit.”

Subject:    snow sports expert, brooke
Hey Brooke,

Being an expert (‘intimidator’) in snow sports and showing success with Yo Beat, I wanted to contact you regarding an Expert Blogger opportunity on one of XXXX winter sports comparisons (snowboards, skis, etc).

We already have some experts blogging on other topics. Mountain bikes is just one example.
(http://somestupidsitenoonehaseverbeento.com)

Aside from sharing your opinion on our comparison, you’d be able to link to your site and drive SEO through your posts.

Are you interested in being the expert blogger for our snow sports comparisons?

Best Regards,
XXX

Does it pay?

$20 per post, you can write up to 4 per week
They only have to be 200-400 words, I attached the guidelines

It really pays for itself considering how much it can boost your SEO and customer awareness

Wow! PAYS FOR ITSELF! I can’t wait to boost my customer awareness by writing for slave wages on some site I’ve never heard of. Thanks for thinking of me!

Subject: Product Review Opportunity for YoBeat

I just visited YoBeat while searching through Skiing and Snowboarding blogs and websites. I work for XXXX, where you can turn your own photographs or art into canvas prints. Would you be interested in reviewing a canvas print of your own photo, or giving one out to a reader? In exchange you could link over to our site. A canvas of your best ski trip memory or snowboarding picture would be an awesome idea to share with your readers.

Here are some examples from other bloggers who reviewed our product:
Daley’s Dog Years
House of Hepworths
Words to Run By
Mountain Bike Riders

Is this something you would be interested in?

Yeah, no.

Subject: History of Burton Infographic

My name is XXX and I am contacting you on behalf of XXXX, an online snowboarding retailer. We think YOBEAT is a great snowboarding site with fantastic pics and videos and could use a new board to give to your readers (which could be an awesome prize for your win section: http://www.yobeat.com/category/winstuff/).

If you embed the History of Burton infographic we created (the embed code is below) on your site, we’ll enter you in a contest to win a snowboard. We think it’d fit in here: http://www.yobeat.com/. When you do so, just email me the
link to the post.

We’re wrapping it up on 10/21 and will send an email with the winner the following week.

Thanks and let me know if you have any questions.

Thanks!

Yes, I have a question. Why would anyone in their right mind agree to do this?

That’s it for now, although I am also still enjoying the giant brands who still want to trade ads for “product.” Once again, I’m happy to do an ad trade. For money.

First, attempt to enjoy this video of shaky GoPro footage I made from a couple days at Pico over Christmas. However, I feel I should warn you that most of the clips are so bad I kinda of gave up on editing them halfway through and just exported. The song is good though, and Jared is KILLING it with his new found method skills.

In other news, I’ve been back on the web development game as of late. I use the term “web development” loosely, but I have managed to fix up a couple friends’ sites with my wordpress css tweaking skills. Click on the screen grabs below to check them out if you are so inclined. It’s also made me feel like this here site need a refresher, so I might just have to do that…

And finally, I just received the latest copy of Onboard from all the way across the pond. I’ve been writing a “Letter from America” for them all season, as well as contributing to King Snow Mag. I don’t have a scanner at home, and nothing annoys me more than when people take blurry digital photos of print pages to show them off, so you’ll have to go find a copy of these mags if you want to read my stuff.* If you do, give me feedback, because it’s awfully strange writing stuff and not getting a bunch of hate comments about how much it sucks. I sort of wonder if anyone even sees it.**

*If I get motivated I will scan because I realized my “printed work” section hasn’t been updated since like 2008. Oops.

** Looks like King Snow has an online issue, so check out The Make Out Web:

and the On Hill Break Up:

Someday, we’re going to look back on this period in history and have no trouble remembering it because there is so very little that happens that is not captured on video. Barring a complete melt down of the Internet, we will have plenty of stuff to show to our kids and grand kids to go along with our “when I was your age” stories. It’s going to be great.

In the meantime, however, society is suffering from a web video overload. And most of those videos, especially the ones featuring snowboarding, are really bad. However, that should be qualified a bit: to you and your friends they are amazing, but to the general public who doesn’t know you and your friends, well, they’re bad.

We get a lot of edits at YoBeat, and these days, there’s too much coming in to post everything separately — even some of the decent stuff. That was the inspiration behind rejected edits: give kids their 15 minutes and and show the actual snowboarding going on around the world, without pushing down the content we spent time and money creating on the site. And hopefully make it funny. Most people seem to get it and enjoy it, but there are a few who are deeply offended that we would “hate” on these edits. For those, I set out to create the ultimate rejected edit (above) so that I could include it in the post. It seemed to work, as multiple people said they shut it off after a little bit because it was so bad (before they realized it was Jared and I, of course.) So what does it take to make a truly hard to watch web edit? Here’s my checklist.

1. Overly long intro. Nothing is worse than a 1 minute long intro on a 3 minute video. I think the need to craft an intro is a hold over from the TV show format, or sometimes it’s just an attempt to get to the first verse of the song. There are all sorts of reasons why it seems like a good idea. But in short, it’s not. When it comes to the web, less is more.

2. Bad song. If a song had already been used in a bunch of videos, or is just plain bad, don’t use it. Simple. The song has so much to do with the vibe of the video, so pick one that fits what you’re trying to accomplish. And the less it’s been used, the more better it is.

3. Too much footage. It’s great to use all of your friends’ footage. They’ll be stoked. However, no one wants to watch your friend who just learned to 50-50 boxes. Maybe his mom. So show them the footage, but leave it in the folder on your desktop. Same goes for half landed tricks or falls that don’t look gnarly. NO ONE ELSE CARES. And if your snowboard stunt edit is over 3 minutes (meaning, it doesn’t have a story line) it’s too long. A good rule it to edit it and then go back through and cut it in half. Again, less is more.

4. Cheesy effects. Just because Final Cut does it, doesn’t mean you need it in your edit. Vignetting is an obvious attempt to make a bad edit good, and most of those high tech effects and transitions make things worse, not better. What’s the saying? Oh yeah, less is more.

5. Ugly titles. Comic sans=bad. But in general, less is more.

YoBeat is my day job.

Check out my exit rant and a gallery of some wakeskate photos from the past 6 years on Alliancewake.com today. http://www.alliancewake.com/skate/dear-wakeskating/

Been so busy lately I feel like my head might explode. Big news soon, but first, I received an email from an aspiring shred filmer asking if YoBeat was my “job” and how I did it. Despite not knowing what day it is, I took the time to answer, and will now re-purpose it into a blog so that in the future, I can simply respond with a link.If you care: (more…)

Apologies for another boring and nerdy post, but I have three things I want to make very clear.

1. Premiere vs. Premier. An event where they show or do something for the first time is not a “premier.” Premier actually refers to the rank of something, so while the best video showing ever could be the premier premiere, and average one is just a premiere. Get it straight if you’re going to be writing about snowboarding in particular during the Fall, ok?

2. They vs. It. Most companies have lots of people working for them. So yes, it can be tempting to call one company in particular “they.” However, there is one ONE of that company, so when you want to refer to it in a sentence, the company is an it. However, if you want to talk about the people working at the company, and are referring to “the staff of brand X” that is a they. Gosh.

3. Compound modifiers. So you love to use lots of adjectives in your writing — really spices things up. Then you better learn to use damn dashes right to make all those extra adjectives into compound modifiers. Think of it this way: If the colorful and exciting words just put in front of that noun together are all required to get across exactly what you mean, then they need a dash connecting them. Let me find a good Nick Lipton sentence to demonstrate.

Here is how it looked when I first visited the post:

Allow me to demonstrate a proper insult you ignorant, hairy palmed, has enough time to Write In a response because he can’t get his dick wet, anonymous comment board pussy, still afraid of the fun box bitch. Oh wait, I just did.

And here is what it should look like:

Allow me to demonstrate a proper insult you ignorant, hairy-palmed, has-enough-time-to-Write-In-a-response-because-he-can’t-get-his-dick-wet, anonymous-comment-board pussy, still-afraid of-the-fun-box bitch. Oh wait, I just did.

There was no way to make that sentence ACTUALLY grammatically correct, but at least it’s slightly more coherent like that. Now please figure out how to put together sentences. Typos happen (a lot) but at least try to pretend to know how it’s supposed to work. The Internet will thank you.

The latest in a string of useless uses for technology that the magazine industry is desperately embracing are QR Codes. What, you don’t know what QR Codes are or what to do with them? You’re not alone, which is probably why Transworld Biz rolled out a story today about how this little black and white eyesore will revolutionize brand marketing and interact with “that brand at a whole other level.” Now I am not attacking Transworld in particular or print in general in this little rant, so I want to make that clear right now. In fact, the more time goes by and things progress, the more I have realized there is definitely a place now, and will be in the future, for quality print publications in snowboarding, skateboarding, etc. These activities are very visual and let’s face it, photographic shred porn just doesn’t translate to the Internet like it does in glossy pages. That said, QR Codes are just retarded… With so many reasons that QR codes are a waste of marketing dollars, here are just a few.

1. Most people don’t know what they are or what to do with them. So you’re checking out the latest issue of your favorite mag and you come across a QR Code in an ad for a company you may or may not care about. What do you do? Oh yeah that’s right, 90% you keep flipping the pages. Because that is how people interact with magazines. But let’s just say you are one of the 10% who see it and are interested. Your next step is pulling out your phone. For the 70% of you who didn’t get lost on that step, now you need to download the app. Figure that lost another 20% of people, even though it’s free. Now we have 10% of 10% of magazine readers left hold their iphone awkwardly over the page trying to line up the code in that little square. Having actually done so myself, I’d just like to point out how many times it has worked for me. Oh yeah, none.

2. People don’t even click on online banners. They don’t. I mean, maybe if it’s got a compelling call to action .2% of people will, but in general, Online ads are simply there for branding (and they work to expose the brand to that site’s audience really well, but that’s about it.) And remember, clicking on online banners is easy. Really is. So not only do QR codes offer a very muddled call to action (if people even know what they are) but they require effort to use. Did you know people are lazy? Yeah, they are.

3. If you’re reading a magazine… There’s a good chance you don’t have Internet access/phone service. You’re say, on a plane, or in the crapper. So even if you had your phone and wanted to scan a QR Code, you can’t. Yes, I’m sure some people probably still relax on the couch with a cup of tea and a roasty fire curled up with their favorite magazine, and their iphone by their side, but I don’t know any of them.

Admittedly, I haven’t seen the “amazing analytics” from the ads that have used QR codes, but I’m willing to bet they are even sadder than the average click through rate. My advice to magazines trying to sell ads: concentrate on making amazing content people can’t get online and are willing to pay for. And for advertisers: diversify your marketing, because trying to get people to go to your website with a magazine ad isn’t going to work, no matter how neat the technology seems.

Oh, and if you are really motivated, scan that QR code above.