Writing – Photos – Travel – Crafts

The man of the hour

Our friend Kevin Nimick is battling nut cancer, which is a total bummer, both for his balls and his wallet. Luckily, Portland is full of great people and Kevin knows most of them, so the out pouring of support has been strong. In the past week, there have been two big events to raise money, and last night, I made it to one of them. Tim Karpinski’s Together Gallery played host to “Midnight Adventures,” a collaborative art show in which all of Kev’s arsty friends created and donated art. Everything was then sold, silent auction style, to the highest bidder. The turnout was a veritable who’s who of cool dudes and dudettes in Portland and a good chunk of cash raised for Kevin’s treatment.

Cancer can suck it and we’re sending good vibes to Kevin, as well as Jake Burton, who announced last week he’s also battling the disease. If you’d like to help Kev pay his lofty bills, Airblaster is selling limited edition Air Terry shirts, and all proceeds go to Kevin. Get yours at Exit Real World or on the Airblaster webstore. You can also make a donation at http://kevsgotcancer.com/

Packed house of the coolest dudes in PDX

Nick Dirks is sitting on a very tiny chair for some reason.

Beer was all the way in the back, so it was wise to get two.

Art. All reasonably priced.

Also art. I am not sure who went home with this gem.

Party Time Nate Betteker and Poler’s Kharma Vella

Alex Mertz keeps it classy

Nike Snowboarding boss guy Brian Craighill clearly didn’t want his photo taken.

Austin Smith was having a really good time. Or maybe he was just really excited about getting his photo taken!

Even the BMXers were there. Yobeat creative director/flatland department Jared Souney and Goods BMX owner Shad Johnson

Tim Karpinski was rocking a sort of vampire-look, which is probably why this photo is out of focus.

Portland’s first couple of snowboard videography, June Bhongjan and Joe Carlino

You may know Brent Atchley better as a pro skateboarder, but last night he showed up dressed as Christian Slater.

Intern was triple fisting. Also, he’s been wearing that cardigan since he got here.

Instagram is easily the coolest thing since Twitter. If you’re not familiar with the “quirky” photo sharing service by now, you either don’t have an iPhone, or are dead. Just in case though, it’s where hipsters post pictures of their cats and plane rides and put filters on them to make it look “artsy.” Since owning mac products is practically a requirement for being a professional snowboarder these days, you can be sure the many of the coolest pros are all over the ‘gram and you can follow them and live vicariously through their images. If you’re looking for some sweet dudes (and dudettes) to follow, look no further, as we’ve made a list!

[instapress userid="hadeslife" piccount="4" size="150"]

Laura Hadar
Handle: hadeslife
What you’ll see: Vacation pics, stuff that makes you jealous.
Frequency of posts: Multiple times a day

[instapress userid="dannykass" piccount="4" size="150"]

Danny Kass
Handle: dannykass
What you’ll see: Scandalous photos of the Dingo, hot babes and corny jokes.
Frequency of posts: All the fucking time

[instapress userid="shayneposs" piccount="4" size="150"]

Shayne Pospisil
Handle: shayneposs
What you’ll see: Scenes from the Jersey shore, and probably snowboarding, once the season starts
Frequency of posts: Sporadic, yet regular.

[instapress userid="seanablack" piccount="4" size="150"]

Sean Black
Handle: seanablack
What you’ll see: Blurry photos of all your favorite Utah boarders, and Pat Fenelon.
Frequency of posts: Clearly depends on how bored he is.

[instapress userid="tjschneider" piccount="4" size="150"]

Tj Schneider
Handle: tjschneider
What you’ll see: Art, bro.
Frequency of posts: TJ has been posting hard and fast for awhile now.

[instapress userid="leannepelosi" piccount="4" size="150"]

Leanne Pelosi
handle: leannepelosi
What you’ll see: Food, exotic locations and random Canadian stuff.
Frequency of posts: It actually looks like Leanne is bored with Instagram now, but you never know.

[instapress userid="peetard" piccount="4" size="150"]

Peter Line
Handle: peetard
What you’ll see: Weird shit, man.
Frequency of posts: Rare, but always exciting.

[instapress userid="highpoweredstreetdrugs" piccount="4" size="150"]

Corey Smith
Handle: highpoweredstreetdrugs
What you’ll see: Artsy stuff, snowboard wasteoids and hot LA babes.
Frequency of posts: Multiples at a time, multiple times a day.

[instapress userid="think_thank" piccount="4" size="150"]

Think Thank
Handle: think_thank
What you’ll see: We assume this one is actually Burtner, which means it may be pictures of the lovely Pica or shots of shots from whatever he’s working on.
Frequency of posts: Regular enough you won’t forget about him.

[instapress userid="btoddrichards" piccount="4" size="150"]

Todd Richards
Handle: btoddrichards
What you’ll see: Embarrassing pictures of sidekick Mike, surfing, and shots of whatever album he is listening to, as if anyone cares.
Frequency of posts: Depends on his mood.

[instapress userid="jjthomas_" piccount="4" size="150"]

JJ Thomas
Handle: jjthomas_
What you’ll see: Whatever extreme activity he’s participating in at the time
Frequency of posts: As often as he gets extreme.

[instapress userid="seangenovese" piccount="4" size="150"]

Sean Genovese
Handle: seangenovese
What you’ll see: Mousetraps, shadows and artsy stuff.
Frequency of posts: Enough.

[instapress userid="drink_water" piccount="4" size="150"]

Austin Smith
handle: drink_water
What you’ll see: Drink water propaganda.
Frequency of posts: Not frequent at all, in fact.

[instapress userid="terje_haakonsen" piccount="4" size="150"]

Terje Haakonsen
Handle: terje_haakonsen
What you’ll see: Who cares, it’s Terje. Just follow him.
Frequency of posts: When it matters.

While you’re following, may we also recommend Yobeat staff members @nicklipton @brookegeery @jaredsouney and @patfenelon. We’re really hip.

If you missed it, read Part 1 here.

It only took one day riding at Cerro Catedral Bariloche to realize this place was like nowhere I’d ever been before. I mean, I’m a pretty badass snowboarder, totally been there, done that, but this place was something else. For part two of my tale, I won’t bore you with a break down of each an every day, rather a few specific examples of how incredible it really was.

Just a buncha babes, riding pow.

The People

I’m definitely not 21 anymore, so going snowboarding can sometimes make me feel a bit old, not just because everywhere hurts and it takes forever to warm up. But at SGT’s adult session, I was pleasantly surprised to find the other “campers” in attendance ranged in age from mid 20’s to 50’s. Almost all were from North America, and a surprisingly large number were female. (It probably didn’t hurt the female ratio that it was the Roxy session, and many of the girls who’d come for the previous session we’re forced to extend their stays due to Hurricane Irene and civil unrest in Chile.)

Roxy Chicas Erin Comstock and Robin Van Gyn

As far as “sweet pros” went, Robin van Gyn and Erin Comstock were the guest coaches, and Laura Hadar also randomly turned up. Hadar was down on her own accord, filming with Austin Will for what will potentially be an incredible project, and staying with some guy they’d met on couchsurfing.org. Every morning we’d meet up at the gondola and break off into groups. And almost every day I found myself riding with a group of girls. Riding with other females is not something I’ve typically gone out of my way to do, but somehow, out of a big group of bitches, there was only one actual bitch, and it was amazing.

For the most part, everyone kept up and no one complained, although there was one time when a camper asked Chris Coulter (our token dude) if we could just cruise groomers for a run. He laughed and just said, “No.”

This is Lower Laguna (two days after the storm). Feel free to start picking out your lines now.

The Riding

After a slow first morning, things moved a bit faster the next few days in Bariloche. Fast being a relative term because in Argentina, it is customary to rush nothing. They don’t understand lines, opting more to form masses, and there is no urgency to do anything. In other words, it’s a good place to be on vacation. However when a foot of new snow falls, it can be mighty frustrating that the staff of the resort has way more work to do, yet doesn’t get there any earlier.

Being accustomed to the “no friends on a powder day” rush it was strange how slowly things moved the morning of the biggest snowfall. Luckily though, the volcano scared most people away and there were no lift lines. And when there’s new snow at Cerro Catedral, it means party pow laps for SGT all day.

The worst part of being a coach is letting all the stupid campers go first. Chris Coulter.

From the first gondola until well after three we didn’t stop, riding untracked pow every single run. No, seriously. If a spot had been hit, you’d simply traverse a bit further and have it all to yourself. We only got one day of inbounds magic, but at the end of it, I found myself walking at an Argentine pace (read: slow) back to the hotel, so tired I could barely move. Ironically, the days we’d hike require less energy exertion because there was more downtime and less leg burning.

And about the hiking. I don’t hike. Ever. That’s why there are lifts. But in South America, I went for it and you know what? It wasn’t that bad. The Lower Laguna hike, which we did almost every day, got easier and easier, and by the end I could make it to the top without feeling like I was dying. The upper Laguna hike, however, I did once (a requirement for the best view ever) and when Robin asked the next day if I wanted to do it again I literally LOLed. It was worth it that one time though, and I’d like to give a shout out to SGT resident shit-giver David Burg for forcing me to the top.

The view from the top of the world.

The Party

With only a few days under my belt, something magical happened. I felt 19 again. I could shred, party and still function. I tried to describe it as a combination of adrenaline, excitement and booze, but Lipton explained to me, no, that’s what fun feels like. To have the most fun though, some life alterations were required. While I’d definitely told someone not to listen to, or follow, Skylar Holgate, I will say he explained the best how the SGT coaches were able to party all night, every night, and then hike and ride pow every day.

Around 7:30 every night, this pool looked much more like sausage stew.

In Argentina, the party starts at 11 pm, at the earliest. So while it was easy to get distracted by après festivities at the base, or the indoor-outdoor heated party pool at Base 41, if you really wanted to do it right, a nap was required from after riding, until dinner at 9 (possibly with a brief wake up for tea time at 5.) Then, if you really wanted to get after it, another hour or so of sleep after dinner and you were ready to hit the bar. A few hours at the bar, and it was time to go to the club, where you would stay until 5 or so. Then it was up at 8 to go snowboarding, which sounds scary, but if you did the napping right, you actually logged a solid 6-7 hours of sleep each day.

Skylar also told me that trying to keep up with the coaches, especially Burnsy, was not a good plan, so I tried to keep it mellow. It was only on my last night in Bariloche I found myself chugging Fernet and cokes until 5 am with Dunfee and Garrett Russell at someone’s birthday party. Considering we had to stop halfway through the cab ride home so that I could puke (luckily they both spoke Spanish to communicate this to the driver) I guess it was pretty impressive that I was up for breakfast at 8 the next day. I hadn’t planned on riding, but everyone convinced me to go check out the Chicas Only contest, the annual event that brings out literally 100s of girls to hit mini park obstacles. I didn’t really ride, but I did maintain my buzz from the previous night at the handy dandy mid mountain lodge. And honestly, it was probably one of the most fun days I had on hill.

Approximately 3 beers deep and still drunk from the night before. Don’t judge. Photo: Ryan Dunfee

My trip was 10 days total, and I think I rode 6 days in a row. I could have ridden one more, but my Achilles tendon felt like someone was shoving knives into it, and there were inexplicable bruises all over my body. I’d gotten epic pow, jumped off stuff, and even hit a park box. I decided to jump back on the 20-hour bus to Buenos Aires. I spent my final night and day in South America drinking with tourists from around the world, mastering the BA public bus, and making friends with someone who may or may not have been a bum. But I think that’s a story for another time and place, so I’ll leave it at this: if you ever get the chance to go snowboarding in South America, do it, duh!



The hobbit trees we’re easily one of my favorite runs. This is the hobbit hut for which they were named.

I would have been so mad at myself if I didn’t get this photo taken.

Definitely not the only one of these…

James Haffner. Photo: Ben Giradi

The mad man that is Skylar Holgate. Photo: Ben Girardi

Randall Stacy. Photo: Ben Girardi

Jumpin’ Jack Hessler. Photo: Ben Girardi

Johnny Aguillera. Phoro: Ben Girardi

*** Special thanks to SASS Global Travel and all the SGT coaches for making this possible. And also thanks to Jared Souney for running the site while I was gone. ***

Vacation is definitely trending this season. Forum already made a movie about it, and Salomon is working on one too. Since my only goal in life is to be cool and on trend, I felt like it was time to make a little vacation happen for myself.

Wait, that’s not true at all. In fact, I am terrible at vacation. I generally spend the whole time glued to my computer doing the exact same thing I would do at home, but with a different backdrop and slower wifi. So why would I bother dropping a couple grand and sitting on planes and busses for literally days to go to South America and work from there? That is a really good question, one that I put out of my mind when I impulse-booked a flight to Buenos Aires, Argentina a few weeks ago for SGT Session Six at Cerro Caterdal in Bariloche.

Since I was going to try my best to vacation, I had a couple rules. Rule 1: leave the boyfriend at home. Rule 2: Don’t worry, it’ll work out. But as a “jaded industry person,” I did wonder what the fuck I was doing going to snowboard camp even though (full disclosure alert) they gave me a sweet “industry” deal. Was I really spending a chunk of money to go hang out with a bunch of fashion-conscious teens and get coaching help on my snowboard riding? Really? Keep in mind I also did little-to-no research on what I was getting into, and watching one of the session edits pretty much cleared up that’s not what SGT is about at all. Camp is the wrong word. It’s more of a travel agency meets touring facility, with a bunch of dudes who are specifically there to show you the best terrain and snow possible. In other words, for an old person such as myself, heaven.

The path to heaven, of course, was a bit more difficult than anticipated. A recent volcanic eruption about 60k away in Chile left the Bariloche Airport closed (a fact, which SGT’s resident jester Lucas Moore informed almost immediately was due to Socialism), so your options were a flight to Esquel followed by a four hour bus ride, or a single 18-20 hour bus ride on a “luxury” bus, the latter being several hundred dollars cheaper. I opted for the long bus and settled in for what was actually a remarkably comfortable ride, including regular meals, free booze and occasional announcements in Spanish I just hoped weren’t important. Nearly 50 hours after leaving Portland, I arrived at Base 41, home for the next 7 or so days.

I’d come in a couple days early because fellow blogger/ SGT resident nerd Ryan Dunfee told me I’d have a way better trip if I did. Since I was “going with the flow” I didn’t question it. However, getting there before everyone else in my session, I got no real orientation, just the basic info I needed (meal times and wireless password) and spent the first afternoon of my vacation working. However, since it was vacation I did purchase myself a 1 liter Quilmes (Argentine Budweiser) to make myself feel like less of a nerd. (I should note the final two weeks of the summer are adult sessions, which meant only two teens, who were pretty cool aside from not being impressed by my DJ skills, and super lax rules about open containers on the compound.)

Roxy Dinner with Erin Comstock, Robin Van Gyn and more girls than you’d think would travel to South America to snowboard.

In Argentina they don’t eat dinner until 9 pm, which as someone who prefers to be in bed by nine was sort of an issue. It also means that by the time the Roxy Girls convinced me to come to the fancy all-meat dinner they were holding for the girl campers (of which there were surprisingly many) my first night there, I was already happily buzzed. At dinner, we got to check out Peep Show, eat tons of meat, and of course, drink wine. Lots and lots of wine. And then when dinner was over, there was more wine left, so I decided to take it, and finish it back at camp before going to bed. It seemed like a good idea at the time, after all, I was on vacation.

MMM, Meat.

Luckily everyone was moving slow the next day, because apparently when you travel long distances, then drink for half a day, the next morning can be a little rough. Head coach and SGT’s resident Canadian party animal Andrew Burns was the only one who seemed annoyed that it was about 11 am before we actually made it to the base of the gondola for what would be my first day riding. Me, I didn’t give a fuck cause I was on vacation (and hungover.)

Much like they feel about meat, they feel about sweets in Argentina. Here’s the morning spread at Tage, where we’d grab lunch every day.

It hadn’t snowed much, if at all, in the past few days, and the snow pack at Cerro Caterdal was abnormally low anyway, so I was informed we’d be hiking for the goods. After a gondola ride and a chairlift, my entire warm up run was about 50 yards of snowboarding before I unstrapped, received a quick crash course on avalanche safety and beacon use and then started walking upwards to Laguna.

The first hike is always the hardest, especially when you have office legs and no clue what you are doing. I was keeping a good pace until SGT’s resident mountain man Skylar Holgate caught up to me and basically told me I’d last about 1/4 of a hike if I tried to keep up with SGT’s resident hardcore badass dude Chris Coulter as he was “a mad man.”

Coulter and Skylar were hiking further to do some sweet slash which I did not get the shot of. I dropped in from here.

“The trick to lasting all day is to go at your own pace,” he explained. “Take rest steps and don’t try and keep up. If your quads are burning, you’re walking too fast.”

I took that to mean I could take my sweet ass time, and I did, eventually making it to the top of lower Laguna about a half hour later with heavy breath, but enough energy to make it back down, and maybe even back up again.

Visibility could have been better, but the Laguna bowl offered just about any pitch, feature or line you could possibly want, and thanks to the heavy wind, they were all blown in with untouched snow. I don’t really know how much detail you’ll need to believe me, but the fact that I willingly hiked back up to do another run should say enough.

The exit from Laguna some of the coolest looking trees around.

After a few runs at the top, Burnsy, Skylar, Coulter and SGT’s resident badass babe Nicki Slechta asked if I was down for a tree run. My legs burning to the point I could barely hold a heelside edge I said, of course, I’m on vacation! What they didn’t tell me though, was that the run involved the “plank of justice” — a tree across a rocky creek you had to traverse to get to the bottom. With better snow, or more energy, I feel like this wouldn’t have been a problem, but when we rolled up on it and I look at the 10 or so feet I’d have to stay balanced, well, I didn’t even try not to fall in the river. Luckily I fell uphill, so it actually was not that bad, but nothing like falling into a hole in front of a bunch of people you just met to really make you feel cool! Thankfully, the coaches all assured me I was not the first, and would not be the last, and only laughed a little bit when I then proceeded to fall into another hole on the run-out of the trees. At this point it was a traverse (at times across mud) and then a matter of picking your way through the mud and rocks to the bottom of the resort. While we did have days where you could ride down, in general the coverage at the base of the hill was thin at best, I was informed mostly due to the fact Patagonia is directly under the hole in the ozone layer. Possibly true story.

One of the two holes I fell in this run.

After snowboarding at Cerro Cathedral, there are two real options: “Shopping”, the literal mall at the base of the resort where you could get food, coffee and drinks or Apres at Mute. Lucky for me this was a shopping day, because going straight to Fernet and coke would have been a bad idea, plus I still had a week to go…

Since this is the Internet and I know most of you stopped reading 500 words ago, I’m going to leave this riveting vacation tale here for now. If you’re that enthralled, go here to read part two and check out the video.



My view from del Bosque. Day 1.

It’s really fucking beautiful up there. Photo: Ben Girardi

Timmy Tausig demonstrates what snowboarding should be like. Photo: Ben Girardi

Scott Kuchinski, tree freestylin. Photo: Ben Girardi

Randall Stacy, intern, avy survivor, boarder dude. Photo: Ben Girardi

Dear Summer,

Technically you were supposed to start on June 21st. I would have been nice if you started early, and acceptable if you waited until July 4th because this is Oregon, and we’re used to that. But cold and rainy on July 18, 19th and 21st is really not going to work. You see, this is easily the busiest week of the summer snowboarding season at Mt. Hood. I’m not sure exactly why so many events have been packed into this session, but everyone is up here trying to get things done.

The rain on Tuesday was ok, I guess, though it was a bummer for the shop dudes who came from all over to test out Nike Boots from the future in the 2012 wear test. We made the best of it though, with a little afternoon drinking at the Rat, during which time we were able to convince Jesse Burtner to have a grown-up premiere of Ransack Rebellion. That lead to a night of drinking at the Rat, and a who’s who of snowboarding, including ender-haver Nick Visconti, got a sneak peak of the movie. It was good. Like real good, and while it was running, we all forgot about the miserable weather outside. (The whiskey helped too.)

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Then on Wednesday, you kept the clouds low enough that the campers could finally get some real riding in. POW’s first annual Golf/Snowboarding tournament happened, as well as the Mt. Hood edition of Boxes for Days. We really appreciated that, as did the High Cascade campers who tried to get the most-tech on the super long box set up and win boards, beanies, wax and more. Bananas were flying, Burter was emceeing, kids left with snowboards and someone even scored a Poler tent. Really, every one won.

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Would it have been so much to ask for another nice day today (Thursday, Day 6, Day 5, depending on where you are)? We don’t really care about the events that were put off today, but we do feel bad for the snowboard campers who paid $200 to see Harry Potter at Sandy Cinema, again. Oh yeah, and we’re doing our Frozen T-Shirt contest webcast from Windells tonight at 8. I mean, we can do it inside BOB, but it’s so much nicer out in the fresh air. Just saying…


Look at what the rain has forced the dudes at the DC house to do!?

So look, you have one-two more days this session to make it up to us. On Friday our friends at Homeschool Snowboarding are having a Method contest. It’s gonna be in the public park, which means you have to give us 100% sunshine. No low lying clouds, no fog, no rain. Just sun. I promise, we’ll take advantage of it and be forever grateful. No more rain days though, this is getting old. Don’t make us just skip back to winter again and jump a plane to South America.

Thanks!

Yobeat

The stuff Northwest legends are made of. Allister Schultz.

Snow skates flying in every direction. Banana peels littering the ground. Cold cans of Olympia conveniently falling at my feet. It can all only mean one thing: it’s Holy Oly time! But wait, it’s April! Isn’t the annual celebration of Northwest Pride in February? Well, it turns out that bitch La Nina decided the Northwest didn’t need any snow in January, or February for that matter, and rather than truck in snow from afar as in years past, Krush at the crew at Snoqualmie decided to bump the event back a couple months in hopes of snow. It worked.

When winter finally decided to start back up in March, it meant business and it’s still snowing almost daily, with no signs of stopping. So while an April date would seemingly provide a sunny spring day for the event, it was more a combo of sun mixed with various precipitation through out the day. Aside from the date, the 8th Annual Holy Oly was much like all those that came before, with one other noticeable difference. The quarterpipe was extra enormous. It checked in at around 27 feet, giving even some of the most seasoned Holy Oly vets trouble.

Austin Hironaka knows how to donkey kick.

So it took a little bit longer than normal, but within an hour, it was business as usual. Legends including Joey Macguire, Russell Winfield, Peter Line and Allister Shultz proved they still snowboard on the massive wall. A few key players such as Jay Kelly and Austin Hironaka boosted massive airs. The jib kids such as Ben Bilocq, Forrest Bailey, Johnny Lazz and Jason Robinson played in tube city. Jesse Burtner made colorful jokes on the mike (and some off-color ones under his breath.) Krush’s playlist served as the timing system, and Cobra Dogs kept everyone full.

The two-term mayor of Tube City: Forest Bailey

This year, a few awards were added, including the “where you been award,” probably because Allister showed up. (The answer is “Oregon” but that’s beside the point.) There was also the Jean Claude Land-Am award, chosen by Mark Landvik for the most deserving am, Stephan Krumm (who scored an invite to Superpark.) Then there were the usuals: best method, best fall, highest air (they have more clever titles than that), but the one that really matters, immortalized forever in Sharpie on the Oly Cup, is the Holiest of the Holy. For the past several years Manuel Diaz has pleased spectators with his Michaelchucks, but this year, they seemed extra pleasing. For his efforts, the Chilean a half-pallet of beer and the recognition he deserved.

If you’ve ever been to the Holy Oly, you can pretty much imagine the rest, and if you haven’t, well, get your ass to Washington next February, or April for the best damn time you’ll ever have throwing yourself at a massive wall of snow (or watching other people do it).

The spoils of victory!

Results

NW Method Award- Scotty Whitzle
Mayor of Tube City: Forest Bailey
Future of NW Shred Award: Bart Patitucci
Highest Air: Jay Kelly
Land-Am: Stephan Krumm
Holy Diver: Dan Manning
Best Trick: Matt Wainhouse (front 900 tail grab)
Where you been: Allister Schultz

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There’s a dude turning in there. Squint, you’ll see him

I wonder what the first Mt. Baker Banked Slalom was like. You know, before it became legendary and all that. Chances are it was a small and incredibly disorganized event. Some of the participants probably had the best time ever, and others were upset because it took too long to take their runs, or whatever gripe people can come up with at a contest. And of course, there was most likely tons of pow to be shredded between runs.

The first-ever Bone Zone Banked Slalom at Timberline was a lot like that. However, it had a few advantages over that inaugural event at Mt. Baker so many years ago. For one: better equipment. And also, the Banked Slalom formula is pretty much set at this point: duct tape on the bibs, provide food and goodies for the participants, and see who goes the fastest. They also had iPhones, serving as sophisticated timing system, which I’m willing to bet weren’t part of the LBS 1 (hell, they still barely work up there.)

Jimmy, preparing to get a slower time than some of the girls.

Apparently no one told Mother Nature spring has started, because the conditions were basically whiteout for the pro division’s runs. After a feeble attempt at taking photos, I soon opted to ride powder instead. It was awesome. So awesome that when it finally cleared up and the sun came out, my camera was already in the car and I decided to keep riding instead of getting some better photos. I did make it back after the event had wrapped up to take a run on the 2-minute long course. Verdict: it would have been really hard to ride with no visibility. I’m impressed pro winner Gabe Triplette actually made it down in 1:56. Let’s just say it took me longer than that.

Twenty-something years from now I’m sure the crew at Shred Northwest will look back at the event with the fondest of memories. They’ll laugh at the fact the weather didn’t cooperate. They’ll have a much better timing system worked out. And maybe, by then, they’ll even have added “legendary” to the name.

Visibility: approximately 5 feet.

John Laing, Ahmon Stamps and other cool dudes await their runs

The snow was good for lots of things

Cash money for the pros

Product toss for the fans!

Bone Zone Banked Slalom Official times

Mens Pro:
1 Gabe Triplette 156.42
2 Joel Fuquay 158.34
3 John Ragozzino 158.69
4 Allister Schultz 159.75
5 Aaron Sales 201.40
6 Corey Caswell 201.97
7 Ben Covolt 202.78
8 Ricky Hower 202.94
9 Kenny Strope 203.06
10 Ben Beavon 203.60
11 Rick Millet 204.07
12 Ahmon Stamps 204.66
13 Tyler Osland 205.19
14 Logan Fuquay 205.35
15 Clint Ghram 205.47
16 Trent Brashier 205.53
17 Josh Kaiser 205.94
18 Corey Noble 206.31
19 Rob Walsh 206.60
20 John Sischo 206.72
21 Joey Bruce 207.69
22 Andy Berginsperry 207.81
23 Scotty Body 207.93
24 Jesse “Wetrat” Johnson 208.63
25 John Laing 208.50
26 Will Dam 208.62
27 Brandon Clark 211.50
28 Ryan Gossett 212.18
29 Jim Wizvenzberger 214.12
30 Jovian Peters 217.15
31 Grant Miller 217.87
32 Josh Zawaskw 222.00
33 – 666The Beast 222.94
34 Ed Jewell 224.36
35 Chad McQuein 224.64
36 Nick Konine 227.66
37 Brad Trouter 235.87

Men AM
1 Alex Scagliotti 200.12
2 Nolan David 201.87
3 Jay Herger 203.53
4 Owen Brown 203.90
5 Jake Copeck 204.39
6 Keaton Rogers 206.78
7 Dustin Reed 206.90
8 Cameron Weeg 209.63
10 Mark Jasor 209.78
11 Cody Prickett 210.31
12 Alex Lovell 211.41
13 Chris Moore 212.78
14 Bryce Yamasaki 213.03
15 Kevin Swarner 214.20
16 Chris Light 215.28
17 Zach Johnson 221.33
18 Joe Newlander 253.44

Masters:
1 Karma Vella 200.38
2 Sean Aiken 203.43
3 Andy Cross 212.19
4 Tim Snail 214.00
5 Ryan Estep 240.06

Industry/Media
1 Enzo Plati 208.69
2 Scott Auviq 208.78
3 Tanner Salsman 208.81
4 Collin Whalen 210.31
5 Richard Williams 229.40

Girls
1 Marissa Krauiczak 211.62
2 Randa Shahin 211.75
3 Sally Butler 212.06
4 Mimi Charter 212.22
5 Nicole McNullty 213.00
6 Geneva Lyon 225.82
7 Marissa Newberry 229.15
8 Georgia Hall 240.22
9 Destiny Covinginton 257.87

Grom
1 Sean Fitzsimons 212.56

Token Ski
1 Ryan Chapman 204.47
2 Nick Stanton 204.62
3 Chad McKean 224.44

Travis Nevehaus was actually awarded the best jumper prize, but here’s a picture of him on the rails instead.

Ahh, spring in New England. The birds are chirping, the sun is shining… if there was an emoticon for a record scratch I would insert it here. While yes, the name Last Call sort of insinuates the snowboard season is over, after the best snow year in recent record it’s far from it, and spring-like conditions were not on the menu for Eastern Boarder’s annual event. The good news is, it was cold enough to stay snow all day, not rain like had been predicated, so that’s something.

The East’s finest don’t give a shit about crappy weather, slow ass snow and no visibility though. Half of them didn’t even bother wearing goggles. At one point Big Mike Gonsalves hit the wall ride thing with his shirt off.

As my dad would say, “big air.”

As usual there were three sections: Jump, Rhythm section (which sort of lost its rhythm due to the quickly falling snow) and rail set. The course was actually pretty gnarly, even without a slush blizzard, but luckily, there were some gnarly dudes there. There was also an impromptu high ollie contest, sponsored by K2, who apparently makes skateboards now. It made total sense, don’t worry.

As we’ve learned watching Loonatics, dudes like Mike Rav, Johnny O’Connor and Tanner McCarty are real, real good. In the end though, Merrick Joyce had the best overall performance and took home $1500 for his efforts. There were also best trick awards for $200 a pop and all three girls who rode got money.

Mary Rand, now $200 richer.

Results

$200- Best Trick
Jumps- Travis Nevenhaus
Rhythm Section- Tanner McCarty
Rails- Rob Hallowell

High Ollie- 38”
Rob Hallowell
Rile Nickerson

Best Trick
Johnny O’Connor Cab 270 FB- 180 BS Sameway 270

Most Entertaining
Big Mike

Women
1- $800 Michaela Aaronson
2- $400 Jordan Parks
3- $200 Mary Rand

Men
1- $1500 Merrick Joyce
2- $1000 Mike Ravelson
3- $500 Zack Normandin

And the gallery… apologies for the lack of names but Tommy J didn’t want to come back to my parent’s house to tell me who everyone was. I pretty much just knew Rav and Riley Nickerson, so whatever.

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Hopefully no dogs were harmed in the taking of this photo. Photo courtesy of Andrew Hardingham

Snowboarding may be suffering from a lack of personality, but that’s at no fault of Andrew Hardingham. Yeah he’s weird, and no, he’s not afraid of much, and that makes him one of the most colorful personalities in the whole damn sport. Whether eating ice cream in a hot tub, or throwing himself off a cliff with questionable snow pack, Andrew is real and unapologetic to those who don’t understand. Love it or hate it, he’s just gonna do what he thinks is funny.

Do you prefer to be called weird or quirky?

I’ve always miss understood being called weird because I’m thinking the same shit as all my friends, I just try to put it in a short film or on paper once in a while. I think they all forget they thought of the same style of “weird” shit I did, just I thought it down on megapixels. As for the word quirky, it sounds like a retarded kid word. So to answer you I would say WEIRD.

If you were to race Charlie Sheen, who would win?

Everyone gives him so much credit for being strait up and I agree that when you compare him to all the pussies in Hollywood he looks like the king of real dudes. But i think most non image fegot people are the same way. I have often considered my future in politics (during long drives) and all the dirt that will surly surface when some bitches on the opposing team wana f with me. But for me it’s easy, that was the normal me then and this is the me now. I was a normal kid. I laughed at dead hookers and made fun of penetrating real dolls, big deal! People just relate to that better than regular politicos bull shit. I can’t think of one strait shooter style politician that I respect or would vote for if they were up against a real dude who told it like it is. So in life, always compare yourself to a politician. It will all make sense.

Do you actually snowboard or are you just a personality who gets some random Canadian guy to huck themselves into trees and off cliffs?

That’s a really logical question because I probably snowboard less than most pros. I guess I’ve just figured out how to do it productively so I can embrace the best parts more often. By this I mean I like to snowboard alone or at least I find myself doing it alone most of the time. So often I find working involves too many people doing too much lame shit. So I just piss off and do what I consider to be rad shit. That creates a kind of solitary snowboarding environment for me and it’s incredibly productive as far as work goes so I have more time to just shred pow and cliffs on my own with out having to film or shoot. I think it keeps me in love with the activity of snowboarding, ya know.


Actually snowboarding in Alberta. Photo courtesy Andrew.

How have you remained such a mystery all of these years?

I don’t think I am. I just think I’m barely interesting enough to stay in the game. My style of riding has never landed me big dollar production. It’s that kind of exposure that makes you blow up and hit the radar. I’ve never had the opportunity (travel budget) to film with big companies or shoot with big time photographers. So that’s kept me “just” in the scene. Which is a wonderful place to be if you dont want to turn all fancy pants and start riding for an energy drink sponsor (no hate on that, just not for me).

Are you still invincible or has it worn off?

I am still invincible! Just not indestructible.  I did break my pelvis in 9 places on one jump. But in less than a year I was boarding hard again. So fuck you karma. I’m coming for you, you ugly bitch.

What’s your worst crash to date?

Before the pelvis maybe a black eye or a broken finger. Nothing that would get me laid ya know. I thought after my hip broke I would slow down for a few years but I have already been challenging myself in ways that scare me again. That was always my favorite thing about snowboarding. just feeling the tingle in my special place. When my brain was saying “dont do it, it will hurt you bad” and my body saying “don’t listen to your brain, it’s had way too many concussions to trust.” That is what challenges me the most. And this season I’ve gotten into some cool/ sketchy lines again.

What are you afraid of?

I’m not trying to sound like an asshole, but I’m not really afraid of that much. I’m afraid of the radiation when I set my lap top on my lap. My dinky tingles and I dont like that. Sometimes when I’m driving I think of what it might feel like to send my car into a cool stunt jump on the side of the road and I scare myself a bit there, but I’m far too practical to crash a car. So it’s a minor scare.

What’s with you and unicorns?

I don’t know. It was a thing I said once for a few seconds and it has left a small but pungent impact on people who concentrate on small details. I have a passion for random ideas and that one was random when unicorns were just that. It just added to the part. Unicorns are funny, and I think sometimes, what better animal to be a lesbian (with that hard dildo horn) than a unicorn. People always hate on unicorns but then I think, who would hate on a lesbo. That’s homophobia and very wrong, so don’t do it!


Sad clown? Photo: Mike Fikowski

What’s it like being the ugliest man in snowboarding?

Sometimes I really push ugly in my vids and photos. The reason is quite simple. The world is obsessed with itself. Constantly taking, then comparing photos of ones selves to make sure the world only sees the best most perfect images. I feel like I figured out a way to just be who I am by making myself uglier than I am. Not worrying about how the world (whom i’ll never meet or know) sees me. Then, if one day I meet someone who has seen my work they will think I’m beautiful because I’m just regular old Andrew that day. Insecurities aren’t attractive at all, I’m trying to be secure instead of one of those insecure dumb bitches you meet all the time (I hate my skin, I’m not tanned enough) fuuuuuck, kill me! If I never meet you than you don’t exist to me and I really shouldn’t exist to you. So trying to make you love me seems quite exhausting and pointless.

What do you hate most about being you?

I’m completely dyslectic. My mind sometimes gets ahead of itself and I’ll skip words or even complete thoughts. Pineapple leads to the dust on a butterfly’s wing. That kinda shit. I can’t spell (which I could give a fuck about) but that’s a good sign. I’m a bit random abstract when I’d prefer random sequential. It’s probably just me being my own worst critique, but it’s life I guess.

What’s the difference between a fact and an Andrew fact?

Andrew facts are even more real because one person who knows very little came up with it. duh!


Heli boardin’. Photo courtesy Andrew.

You can only have one sandwich for the rest of your life. What kind would it be and why?

Well I love sandwiches. I used to look so forward to making a sandwich and then mounting up my BMX and riding around my home town eating my newest creation. It almost always had Catalonia dressing on it. I haven’t done that in a while because I got a scooter and now I ride the scooter instead of the BMX. It’s pretty close to as cool, but not quite.

Do you think you are better at snowboarding, acting or filmmaking?

I’m not really that good at any of those things. I wish I was naturally talented like some of the riders out there. I wish I knew how to organize funds better so I could make a better film and I wish I did something other than on the spot idea acting so you could maybe call it acting but I have never done that and dont know that I could. So considering my success in boarding, I’ll go with that.

You’ve been making internet videos since before it was required by sponsors. Why?
I love underground media. I also love making things that huge majorities hate. Nothing says “job well done” like 10 hate mail letters. But making films is my way of staying in touch with my people and my own sense of humor. Some of my best stuff has only seen 40-50 views. Some of my worst shit had 12,000 views. But that’s not up to me. It’s a matter of what people like and don’t like. I enjoy it when people of all walks of life like my stuff. It’s an incredible compliment when people subscribe or comment on my films, good or bad. My dad calls me retarded all the time. But I don’t live life to impress my folks or to not piss off someone, somewhere. I just do what I think is funny and what I think is me. It’s really cool discovering that I have a lot in common with a shit load of people out there on planet earth. Non profit is the base idea, maybe make a buck or two along the way to keep it going, but always keep it small and underground until its ready to go farther. No hurry. That’s my credo.

Is there an amazing story behind the name Thundermouth?

It’s what a true man speaks. Pure, non filtered thunder. I guess between Dustin Craven and I (whom I thought would be more involved in the series) I figured it was an appropriate title. The real title is “THUNDER MOUTH…. SHIT FOR BRAINS”. There is a long pause in between mouth and shit. The pause is to the discretion of the sayer. Feel free to have fun with it!

The last real episode came out in November, what’s taking so long?

That’s the beauty of doing your own thing. You can do what ever the fuck you want. I can’t make fun shit on a deadline so I just wait until it feels like it’s time and go for it. There might be a few in the same month coming up. Maybe not. I don’t know and I don’t think anyone really cares either.

Where do you see yourself in a five years? How about ten?

Rock bottom maybe. I really want to hit rock bottom at some point. I feel like it would be a refreshing start. That’s the plan for 10 years from now. However, 5 years from now I want to get a tape worm and argue with feminists that being pregnant isn’t as hard as they make it out to be. That’s definitely the 5 year plan.


Where’s Andrew? Photo courtesy Andrew

Closing thoughts?

Just be yourself and if a bunch of fegot snowboarders don’t like it, fuck them. If they do like it and they’re girls, fuck them.

You may enjoy more of Andrew on his Youtube page or his WeSC blog. The next episode of Thundermouth… Shit for Brains comes out… sometime.

Tyler Davis. Quarterpiping.

Note: Video and Photo Gallery added, see below New Hampshire is known for its amazing parks, hometown heroes and dirts, but lets face it, only a chosen few ever seem to make it big time. So if you do, it’s good to give back to the less fortunate, which is exactly why Pat Moore has put on Back to the Boneyard for that past three years. This year, the event raised over $1500 for WVBBTS, a scholarship program that helps kids who can’t afford it go snowboarding.

The Waterville park staff, led by the semi-legendary Luke Mathison, recreates the legendary 90s Boneyard park. Everyone from former legends such as Preston Strout, to current legends such as Mike Ravelson as well as enigmas such as Aaron Diamond and Pat Bridges come out to ride.

Pat Bridges, in the flesh, and still winning the invert contest.

If you had to classify the format, it’s a jam at best, with three segments. There is a scary looking-90s jump, though only 30 feet to the sweet spot it boasted a 24-death gap, which claimed one victim. The Mike Baker Banked Slalom tests how fast you can go (for the record, Pat Moore went the fastest this year) and then a jersey barrier to quarterpipe finishes the day.

There were lots of hand plants, some small airs (and a few big ones), and a couple serious maneuvers over the course of the day. Forrest Bailey put on a demo, Bridges failed to master frontside inverts, Preston Strout wore his 90s costume, Mike Rav turned 21, and a good time was had by all.

New England Stud Nick Esposito

There were awards for just about everything, randing from Pat Moore’s pro model forum snowboard to a sweet as falcon statue, so here’s the complete list.



15 and Under

1) Jack Herald
2) Parker Szumowski
3) James Fawlet

Chicks
1) Julie Kochan
2) Mackenzie Hennessy
3) Mary Walsh

Zach Normandin, King of the Boneyard

Open Class
1) Zach Normandin (King of the Boneyard)
2) Merrick Joyce
4) Nick Esposito

25 Plus
1) Tyler Davis
2) Adam Mettervlle
3) Jaues Beruai

Most haggard kit: Preston Strout
Best Hick: Aaron Diamond
Best Method: Jaques Beriau
Best trick rail: Merrick Joyce
Best Jumper: Luke Mathison
Days of Old School: Preston Strout
Worst taste in music: Pat Bridges
Worst Slam: Alex Cole
Biggest Buzzard: Aaron Diamond



Biggest Pussy Awards

Jump: Ryan Stephany
Banked Slalom: Pat Bridges
Quarterpipe: Mike King

And the video. Well, you know the the infamous “dad cam?” This is it, in all its glory. Yes, my dad made the video. The caveat is he’s actually a “real life” photographer, so it’s potentially composed slightly better than the average “dad cam.” To compensate, we’ve left in some of the dramatic “dad commentary.”

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